Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.All the kings horses and all the kings men, Couldn't put Humpty together again.
The Passion for Reconciliation is, without doubt, the heartbeat of the Gospel. We might say it is THE Mission of the Church to bring and to make Peace. Are any of us immune from hurt or from falling out? Have any of us reached today without making a mistake and hurting others? Probably not. Heavens agenda is for two disciples on earth who are alienated, to find their way home. Follow these steps and there is a better chance for Humpty Dumpty.
Step One: Pray for each other and pray for forgiveness and reconciliation. This is not as obvious as it seems!
Step Two: Meet and get the problem out into the open. Interestingly, Jesus teaches that the onus is on the one offended to seek out the offender. Yet, in the same breath He teaches that winning our sister or brother over is less about proving who is right and more about reaching an understanding. The one who is hurt must be able to articulate clearly what their hurt is. At the same time, they must have the skill of not predicting what the response will be from the offender. Quite often, we bypass this step, referring our hurt to others in the hope that the offender will be chastised.
Step Three: Find support in the form of mediation. The Gospel assumes that disciples have the ability to listen. But when we are being challenged it is hard to remain attentive, and we get busy formulating our defence. Probably because we are more inclined to justify our behaviour rather than truly examine it. Here, we sometimes swing between self defence and flippant apology. We can't just say we are sorry for the sake of it. If we do, no genuine reconciliation will happen. And so, if confession and self examination are part of our daily routine, we might find we are more flexible when dealing with conflict.
Step Three: Ask the wider community for support. Which is quite different from just telling others what happened to us. The wider community might provide someone who will not collude in our need to be stalled.
And then ...... If all these fail, the offending person is considered as one in need of missionary work. Like Tax Collectors and Gentiles they become special objects of the community's relentless care.
All the above reflect our underlying passion for peace. The spiritually informed person is always searching for the next step, the next possibility which will soften hardness of heart.